The Mumma Guilt Trip

OMG! You are going out!

You have managed to wrangle a few hours off mummy duties for a catch up with the girls…very exciting and definitely needed…..BUT THEN….what happens?

Small person number two is ok, they have no idea you are off out for a bit of a life as they are in bed already. But older small person (small person number one) is a different story.

So before heading out the door you get the old mumma guilt trip which goes a little something like this…

#1 – The panic sets in. “What’s happening…why are you dressed up mummy?”… the questions slowly become higher pitched as small person number one realises…You. Are. Leaving.

#2 – The whinging begins. “Can I come too….ohhhh I reaaallllly want to come…plllleeaaaseeee!”

#3 – The mother of all guilt trips – the crying and sad face come out. “Dooonnn’t gooooo Mummyyy”

I have found that this either makes me feel quite bad (i.e guilty) or quite angry….why can’t I just go out have some ‘me’ time and not feel guilty about it…hmmmm?

For a lot of parents doing something for yourself can be like wading through a personal psychological battle….but actually research suggests taking some time out for yourself is soooo good for you, I couldn’t agree more!

I recently asked the question to parents “what would you do if you could have a hassle free night off from the kids”. The answers came thick and fast, I could almost see the daydreamy looks of pure bliss as people thoughtfully typed up their best ever night out (or in).

From simple responses such as having a HOT cup of tea to those unheard of nights out, the movies, dinner, date nights, coffee and cake, there really is such a need for parents to have just a little time out (and not on the naughty step).

It’s quite overlooked this need to really truly have some time to yourself doing fun stuff that you enjoy…..without the kids (shock, horror!)

So it’s really about saying hang on… I’m going to use those movie tickets in my wallet that are now expired that Dad gave me because I NEVER get to go to the movies and he even offered to babysit and I  STILL haven’t used them!

It’s about using those beauty treatments that your lovely, well meaning friend got you for your birthday that you find one day and realise that was 10 months ago!!

Sometime you actually do need a wee break from those darlings that you love more than anything in the world.  

Take a break from the world of smooshed sticky substances you don’t even recognise all over everything…take a break and encourage others around you to do the same, you will all feel so much better for it.

Written by Pauline Rowe, Founder of Cup of Sugar, www.cupofsugar.co.nz